So, you’re a woman. And, you’re living through a pandemic. Now what?!
As the ripple effects of the coronavirus pandemic continue to unfold and expand, one thing has become clear: women are under siege.
At LIFT, we are advocates and allies for women’s whole health; and most preeminently, mental health, which includes emotional and psychological health, as well as social well-being. Why? Because the state of your mental health determines how you handle stress, how you relate to others, and how you make choices in life, and its presence (or absence!) is critically important at every stage of life from childhood to adolescence to adulthood. Mental health problems affect every facet of your life: thinking, moods, and behaviors.
It is indisputable that women have been disproportionately impacted by the pandemic. Since March of 2020, mental health has fallen into a sharp decline for both sexes, but most prominently, for working women. According to a Total Brain survey, levels of depressed mood in women have increased by 83% compared to 36% for working men. Stats from USC’s Center for Economic and Social Research show that ⅓ of working mothers in two parent households report they are the only ones providing childcare (compared to 1/10 of working fathers.) Since March, it is women who have suffered the greatest job losses, and who have reported the highest levels of psychological distress (namely, anxiety and depression.) Also since March, 64% of college educated mothers report having to reduce their work hours, compared to 36% of college educated fathers.
The situational stress triggered by these compounding stressors, on top of the day-to-day load of responsibilities that American women were already hoisting, is contributing to depression and anxiety being reported in record numbers. Mental health issues are even more likely to present when there are underlying biological factors (brain chemistry, genes,) adverse life experiences (trauma, abuse,) or a problematic family history. Depression and anxiety pop up when the stress of an individual’s present situation exceeds their ability to cope. Difficulties such as moving office work, going remote, learning new technology, maintaining order and routine with kids, career and financial insecurity in the face of recession, minimal childcare, isolation from friends and family, increased demands of child schooling, and monitoring the family’s health, have pushed women to a breaking point. To make matters worse, self-care and stress management, (coping skills which may have already been hard to come by!), have gone by the wayside. Yet, without self-attunement and fulfilling our own needs, we risk physical, emotional, and mental ailments. Now more than ever, protective barriers must be in place to insulate ourselves from the risk of burnout, which can manifest in sleep problems, headaches, chest pain, poor diet, difficulty concentrating, irritability, loss of motivation and pleasure, anger, and loneliness.
We can’t pour from an empty cup. Mental health activities and interventions are designed to help individuals cope. Sometimes I use an analogy: The RMS Titanic was described as “unsinkable,” because it was uniquely equipped with 16 water-tight chambers that could be sealed off in case of emergency. This gave the ship's captain, and passengers alike, the illusion of invincibility. It was only after the collision with an iceberg in the North Atlantic that the crew became aware of a tragic flaw in this design: the ship could withstand four cells filling with water, but not five or more. It was the compromise of the fifth watertight chamber that sealed the ship’s fate. I used this analogy recently when speaking with a group of women about the importance of self-care. If stress is the sea, pouring into the boat, then our self-care is our watertight compartments. And, for even the most impenetrable person, too much stress will overcome the protective measures in place, and drag us down.
What are your self-care strategies? These can be any interventions and activities, from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to Mindfulness, that center and ground you to conquer your day from a place of positivity, presence, and peace, rather than panic. A participant in group shared yesterday, “I have realized that this pandemic isn’t going anywhere, so I need to learn how to manage my stress now, and live my life now, regardless. This means finding ways to take care of myself- namely, therapy, walks with friends, virtual happy hour, workouts, and journaling- because I can’t wait for ‘later’ to arrive. I can't wait for the pandemic to be over to begin taking care of myself and living my life." Personally, I have recommitted to doing yoga once a week, even if my children are running in and out while I’m doing it. This one hour of time found has been a personal victory. I am strong, but not unsinkable, and that humble knowledge propels me to continue to seek moments to reclaim for self-care. Please share how you’re taking care of yourself right now in the comments, and reach out if you’re looking for fresh ideas, accountability, or support in your emotional life during this time.
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